Lost

As of late, I haven't been doing anything except bouncing here and there, tracing a route across the US and trying to figure out a new place in the world for myself.

I miss so much about Asia. I miss the masses of chaotic beings working together, I miss the curious stares children gave me in isolated regions, people touching my hair and my skin on bus rides, and the way the days melded one into the other. I miss Indonesia especially. A place that inspires with the people, the land and the seascapes. The spirituality seems to hang in the air there, just waiting to be soaked up. I came home, never thinking for a moment that I would feel more lost in my country of origin then I ever was while traveling to foreign places.

I came home quieter somehow, perfectly content with doing nothing except healing my body. I have been spent the past month surrounded by my loves and family and yet I have felt a bit like a stranger. It just all seems so sterile, so isolated, so futile and I don't yet know how to deal with my those new feelings.

I have decided to find a quiet corner of this vast country of ours and settle in for a bit. I plan to surround myself with books and plants and work tasks and somehow figure out what dreams I want to dream now. See, traveling the world was my dream for as long as I can remember and now that I have done it, I don't know what my new dreams are. Without dreaming I am lost.

Peace, love, and joy


Lara