No Where to Go, No Place to Be.

It's funny how I think of a $50 a night hotel room as a splurge, but in my new reality that's just what it is. 2 nights ago I decided to spend my last night in Italy in the city of Rome, I could hear church bells outside of my private room and a feeling of contentment washed over me.

I have spent the past month of my trip in shared rooms and dorms at hostels and I have to admit, after a while it gets to be too much. It's nice to be completely alone without the fear of someone walking in on me. I am already making lasting memories on my travels and really needed the chance to reflect on them without constant stimulation around me.

I have to admit, Italy was tough at times, mostly because of the language barrier I experienced. It's the first time I have been around people that speak little or no English. More English was spoken in India then in Italy. I had a minor breakdown on the train and had to choke back tears. It is an incredibly solitary feeling to be surrounded by people having everyday normal conversations and not be able to understand a single word of it. I have met a ton of people, first in Sora and later in Praia De Mare that spoke English, but they were mainly tourists and it's just not the same feeling as everyday life would be. Praia De Mare is a tiny beach town on the Mediterranean coast. I spent 5 days there, on the beach, on a boat, and in the water. With the highlight being cliff jumping into the bluest water you can imagine. It was one of the most beautiful places I have ever been too. In the evening, I walked to the village and got dinner with the people from my hostel and had some good bonding times. Days were spent lounging on the beach and getting browner by the day. And then...I knew it would come. That feeling that I needed to move on. It hit me as I was lying on the beach and all I could think of was getting out of Italy as soon as possible. I walked to the internet cafe and searched for flights. Edinburgh, Scotland fit for price and time of departure and that's where I am right now. It's amazing here.

It seems that the longer I am away from home and the more miles I accumulate on this voyage of mine, the more I lose all of the parts of my identity that weren't entirely mine. Most of my pretenses about who and what I am have fallen away and it's just purely me. The conversations I have had with fellow travelers start off with the basics: Who are you? How long have you been traveling? How long have you been in Italy, India, or whevever we may be? Where are you going next? And then the advice follows or the exclamations about how terrific a place is. The backpacker trail is a beautiful thing. Filled with wanderers, explorers and free spirits. Out here, I am nothing special and not so unusual. Its beautiful, how strangers can come together, meetm and become a little bit closer to being a family than most of us solo-wanderers have felt in a very long time.

I will be in gorgeous Scotland for another week or so and then may go to Portugal to meet some poker friends. It will be good to see them, but I am afraid it will be incredibly hard to say goodbye again. After that, I may come back up to Ireland and volunteer at an eco-village with PR work. They are fighting the big oil companies on there coast and I want to do something to help. It will be good to have something to fight for again, even if it's for a short amount of time. I will be making my way down to SE Asia in late September, meeting up with fellow travelers I met in India and volunteering. I plan to spend the next year down there, with a break in Australia thrown in there. My plans keep changing though and its a great thing that they do. I don't want to be locked into a specific date or place and so I am spontaneously wandering. It's the way I love it. Still restless to the core, searching for those special places that will remain in my heart for a very long time.

Peace,love, and joy from Edinburgh Scotland.

Lara